Sunday, July 11, 2010

AOAHCM No More.

This week I've been thinking a lot about this second anniversary of Adventures of a Horse Crazed Mind. I've thought about how this blog has evolved and changed since I first began and how many wonderful people I've met along the way. Back in July of 2008 I had two horses that were apart of my daily life, one here at home, one in reining training.... both of which provided me with plenty of food for fodder for a horsey blog. But by the first week of 2009 I was horseless, for lack of better words, and have been since. I didn't plan it that way. Trust me. The best laid plans of mice and (wo)men....

Not having a horse at home didnt slow down the Horse Crazed aspect of this Horse Crazed Mind and so this blog hasnt completely given up on it's intended topic. Nonetheless, over the past year and half I've steadily broken the golden rule of blogging- I been writing a horse blog that very often has absolutely nothing to do with horses. It's only consistency has been a lack of consistency. AOAHCM is a mish-mash of topics....a sometimes diary, occasional confessional and a venue for the rare rant (or two) with some photos, opinion pieces and a few jokes thrown in for good measure. I've done basically everything they tell you not to do in order to make a blog "work". I didnt care because it worked for me and I loved it.

But at some point along the way I subconsciously stopped just writing whatever-the-hell I felt like and started trying to make this blog in to something that "you" would want to read and curtailed what I wanted to write about if I felt it wouldnt be of interest to others. My passion for blogging began to steady decline as I became increasingly caught up in being a part of the social underworld of bloggerdome *smile* and the expectation of being not just a blogger but a "blogger buddy".

At the beginning I didnt "get" that to blog was to be apart of a social network. But that was also back when I didnt "get" why anyone would want to read what some stranger did in their day. I didnt see that having blogger buddies meant that there was always someone willing and ready to offer their advice, support or just to commiserate. It took me a while to grasp how much we could all learn from each other and how wonderful it could be to be apart of a community filled with amazing people and knowledgeable fellow horseman and horse lovers. I didnt get that. Then I got it and I loved it. Now I value it (and you) but I feel like I cant blog without being a part of it. It now feels selfish (and a little evil) to blog without "giving back". And I feel like a total ass saying that I dont really want to read blogs anymore. I sincerely care that each and everyone of the people I've met along the way is safe, healthy, happy and that your loved ones, furry or otherwise, are healthy, happy and safe. I care about you as people, as human beings who have touched my life but I dont care to participate in blogging as a social community anymore. I honestly feel that everyone on my blog roll (and more) has something of value to say and they all have something to teach me but it takes time to read and comment and these days I want to spend that time on other areas of my life. It is as simple as that.

I have no idea if any of you care in the least whether or not I read your blog or comment... I wouldnt presume you care about this blog or me either. But there are people here in bloggerdome who have touched my life and I feel I owe them at least some explanation for my absence.

Yesterday I was listening to an interview of a really successful country music artist on the radio. He said that no matter if you have success in the pursuit of your passion (or not) you're level of passion for in his case, country music should be the same. No matter if you are selling out stadiums or singing on a street corner, your passion for the art should always be what motivates you and it shouldn't rise or fall with your success.

I want to live my life pursuing the things I am passionate about without every tainting the joy I get from those passions with the disappointment or hype of faltering or towering success and without compromising my expression of that passion to meet the expectations of those around me.

Wow! That's a mouthful!

So this blog is going to change. Change title, topic, and format. I wont start anew because what I've said in the past is still relevant to me. I am still horse crazed. I am still going to be writing about Abby, Hawkydog, life, love and hunky men (sorry DB). But I am probably going to swear (a lot) more (sorry Mom) and I might talk about sex (sorry Mom). And some posts will be long and rambling (like this one.) And probably not entertaining (like this one) but at least I'll enjoy writing my blog again.

Thanks to everyone to has every offered their thoughts and support to Adventures of a Horse Crazed Mind over the past two years. I really do appreciate everything you've done for me (and trust me, it's more than you'll ever know.) But I'm ready for a change.

Adventures of a Horse Crazed Mind's new name is...

Ok... so I dont have a new name yet *sheepish smile*

But I'm working on it.

16 comments:

  1. You are always full of complex changes Chelsi and that is one of the most endearing attributes about you. You have probably been mulling this over for at least a couple of months. Trying to work it through completely before putting it out there. Good on you!

    About the swearing, well nothing I wouldn't have heard before. About the sex, again, your here aren't you. I will look forward to reading your new blog just as much as I looked forward to your old one.

    Good on you and I know it will be as entertaining and thought provoking as your old one.

    Love you
    MOM

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  2. Awesome, good for you! I'm looking forward to your next phase... go with it.

    You have explained nicely a view and expectation and reward of the blog-o-sphere. I feel much the same way.

    Best wishes and kindest regards.

    Word verification: obittize ???

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  3. just keep on writing! I like reading your posts!

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  4. You can write about whatever you want, i find you interesting (even if I dont comment very often) and will still read your blog, and if others dont want to, they are missing out.

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  5. Good for you, Chelsi!!

    I've felt a lot like you're feeling now, for a very long time, and my blog readership has been faltering because of it, although I've not made a public announcement about how I fell or how I've changed my attitue towards blogging.

    I've just sort of morphed into blogging...or should I say...morphed back into the way I used to blog....for me....for noone else.

    I've curtailed my reading of other blogs and only read a handful of favorites, that have been with me from the very start.

    I've come to realize I don't care if I ever have the hundreds of blog readers like the Pioneer Woman...and quite honestly I just don't have it in me to be as witty or creative as she is....or like the 7MSN who is able to be incredibly entertaining even though she rarely leaves her ranch and only blogs about her animals every day.

    I admit it. I'm just too boring. But I am enjoying life now and am growing by leaps and bounds with new skills and interests. I just don't have the time to sit down and read and leave comments on 20-40 blogs every day.
    I've found that my attention span is just too short and I can't help but wander away, dreaming about other things that I should and would rather be doing.

    So, no, you're not an ass for feeling that way.
    If we didn't change, we'd never grow. And that's never good. Who wants to be stuck doing the same thing each and every day for their entire life? Not me. And certainly not you.

    So, blog for you, and if folks can stop by, they will. If they leave you a comment, great! If not, you know it's ok, because your words aren't meant specifically for other folks. They are yours to write as freely and as comfortably as you like.

    ""Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind."
    — Dr. Seuss

    ~Lisa

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  6. There are times when I have no interest in reading other blogs. But I always come back to the camaraderie of the blogosphere. If you don't want to read the blogs of others, you have to accept that you may be blogging in a vacuum, i.e., that your blog may be an online journal in its truest form. It's completely up to you, although I always like it when you stop by.

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  7. Mom- you're the best, as always:)

    Cowgirl Rae- Thanks for your words. I didnt think I'd be alone in feeling what I do but it's always good to hear "go with it" :)

    Kristin- you're an easy woman to please! lol jk

    Crystal- thanks! And that foal in your icon pic is just adorable! His marking looks like a thought bubble.

    Lisa- You are SO not boring! I enjoy your blog, your pictures are always fabulous. It is great to see you enjoying your time with horses and taking some time for yourself. Thanks for the kind words. I was hoping people would "get it" and not think I'm being an ass:) lol

    Leah- I hope I dont loose all the comaraderie I've found here and I'll still probably visit a few blogs but you are right that I risk becoming an online journal of sorts. At this point I either had to really switch things up or I'll quit altogether so... I guess either way I stand to loose something. It is nice to stay connected on other social media sites to those who I am closer with:)

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  8. I have to wonder if this a normal part of blogging growth. I've also felt the same way and have been struggling with my writing. But I've also started writing for myself. Perhaps not as interesting but such is life...

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  9. Yep, there is definitely something in the air...lol!!!!
    I have been thinking the very same thing, and I have been away from blogging for a bit.

    Sometimes, I just want to write about what I want to write about. I have changed a lot the past three years, and I want to...I am not sure yet. I have also considered the online journal aspect of blogging, but I don't know....

    Blogging about a specific topic only shows people a certain side of you. I often think that I must come off as a shallow person with no opinions. But, at the same time, I often feel guilty for speaking my mind...like I am offending someone.

    That is one reason I enjoy FaceBook so much: I am me!!!! My interests, religious views, political opinions, day to day life...it is out there for people to see.
    Maybe I should just do the same on my blog????

    I think it is great that you are branching out and don't be surprised if I do the same thing...

    PS-Lisa??? You are NOT boring...lol!!!! : )

    Oh, and word verification is "mella!" How weird is that??? :0

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  10. Sometimes I do NOT blog about my horses and I notice that my readership goes way down! But, I do have other blogs for other topics! Sometimes we do just have to take a couple of steps back and say, "What is it I really want to say?" Reflection is good!

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  11. You write it, I'll read it. Horsey or not, I always find your adventures interesting.

    When I first started writing my blog I really didn't know what direction I wanted to take it or what I really wanted to write about at all. Frankly, I'm still not sure, I just try to write about whatever tickles me that day.

    Looking forward to the future! Never a dull moment.

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  12. It's your blog and you should do exactly what you want with it. If people read it and comment, that's great, and if they don't that's great too. And don't ever feel that you have to read and comment on others' blogs - that's your choice too. Anything goes, and enjoy, that's the important part!

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  13. Yer kick ass Chelsi ;)

    I'll read ya- no matter what. May not always comment (OK so like... I hardly never comment these days,) BUT-- I'll be here reading.

    You go girl. Ride it like ya stole it, drive it like ya OWN it ;)

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  14. country girl- It seems we are not alone in feeling this way. If we are not enjoying it why on earth would we keep going it!?! It think it's a cowgilr thing... we just dont quit.



    Melanie- you and I are so often on the same page. Horse people especially are infamous for being of a very firm (and outspoken) opinion and in bloggerland it isnt any different... actually I'd say it is worse because we dont have to say it face to face. I dont think blogging would be the same for me if I did it "private"... I like that what I say is said to anyone in the world who cares to hear. But if I wanted to get more personal I think maybe I would consider it.



    Cheryl Ann- My Mom always gets a huge kick out of watching what posts will get comments and which wont... she gets so mad when I do a really deep post and no one cares but then I post about something "stupid" and everyone has something to say. lol It doesnt bother me but it sure gets her panties in a knot!



    Story- thanx:) writing about what "tickles" me will be scary indeed! lol. I'm first to say "each to their own" but I think with blogging that expression is especially true.



    Kate- danku:) I agree that "anything goes" but I'm also the kind of person that gets anxious when I feel like I'm not doing my part or not meeting someone's expectation. I need to get over that. I cant make everyone happy and myself at the same time. It is nice to hear that "its ok"!



    Mrs Mom- No YOU kick ass! lol Thanks for readin... oh... and I tend to "ride it" like I borrowed it:) I need to learn that one too (the ride it like you own it part).

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  15. You're the only blog short cut on my desktop, the only blog I frequent, and I enjoy every post you put here, I brag about you to my friends and encourage them to partake the amazing words you share! I'm so glad you're going to continue onwards - Cheers to your "denovo" is as you move forward in expressing yourself. ;)

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  16. It's your blog - do what works for you. I enjoy reading all the things you write - horse-related or not... So I hope you keeping writing something here...!

    I haven't been good about commenting much eihter - it does take a long time to read and leave a thoughtful comment every where you go.

    Change is good! Here's to change!

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