I wanted to send out a big "THANK YOU" today to all of my friends and family (blog world included of course!) for your support and kind words. Each of you have helped to ease my burden, in not having to face such a heart wrenching decision alone. In my heart, I have to admit that the decision was made the moment he blew up in that trailer, not this past weekend, but last month...all along I have felt it sitting, a huge lump in my throat but I was unable to swallow the weight of it. I hope that one day I will be able to. I have loved every horse I have ever had, both good and bad, but Shaunti stole my heart because he was so needy of my love and attention. I have put so much of myself into getting this horse right, that I am finding it nearly impossible to let go of not just him, but the idea of him; And the future I dreamed of us sharing.
Thank you for your blog...
ReplyDeleteBig Guys MOM.
Hey Chels... I hope you are doing okay. This is a tough thing to work through. I especially know how you feel, your last few sentences of this post are exactly how I felt about Quinn. :( Fortunately he wasn't dangerous in the way Shaunti is.
ReplyDeleteIf you need to talk let me know, we can e-mail, instant msg or talk/text
(yes I'd give you my # :) )
Be strong, you know you are *hugs*
I have read and enjoy your blog from time to time. My heart goes out to you.
ReplyDeleteDeloutre in Louisiana
Have faith my friend...there is the perfect horse for you out there. You gave it your all with this one. Bless his damaged heart-he just had nothing left to give in return.
ReplyDeleteI struggled with the decision to put one of my mares down for a year. She is crippled. She is only 10y/o. She is in pain now. It's time. I look at her and I think about the shoulda, woulda, coulda, but she was born this way, we controlled it as long as we could and now...well, now I have to do the best thing I can for her. No amount of reasoning makes these decisions any less painful for the heart.
My thoughts and prayers are with you on this!
Big Guys Mom- I am so happy that I started to blog. I had no idea what amazing people I would meet or how I would get to connect with my friends and family. I am so glad that people get to read and enjoy. I have to write the good with the bad, I guess.
ReplyDeleteCnd-You are awesome. Thank you SOOO much. I have been over and over and over things in my mind and always come back to the same thing. Dealing with the idea of logistics is the next step and I am not ready to take it quite yet...I'll pull a Scarlet O'Hara again and think about that tomorrow:)
Deloutre- Thanks for stopping in and for your thoughts. I was scared to post about this but am so glad I did, because the support has been so awesome.
BECG- I went down for my weekly lesson (I usually use a schooling horse) and to see my mare Abby. I decided to ride her instead and was blown away by her once again. I have such an amazing horse in her, and SHE is all heart. I am sorry to hear about your mare. It is so hard to find the right time in a situation like that. At what point does it become too much? I have been there with dogs and it is never easy.
Thanks again.
Your welcome, that's a tough decision to make I would not wish it on anyone but after reading your blog for a time I know you are strong enough to handle it.
ReplyDeleteAnd he landed with you - you loved him - I truly believe maybe this is why he came to you.
Smile for me. We are here for you if we were all closer we be over at house giving you a hug.
What else can I say???
ReplyDeleteGlad that you are feeling better about your decision, and I am sorry that you have been put in this situation.
I liked how BEC worded it, "bless his damaged heart, he had nothing left to give." So sad, I am teary.
ReplyDeleteLovely photo of Shaunti w/this post by the way.